Monthly Archives: May 2011

Loss of the imagined.

I’m feeling pretty good today, all things considered.  I saw an old friend at the weekend, whose perspective has been changed by the fact that two of his closest friends have lost babies, very close together.  I also spent 24 … Continue reading

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Haircuts and Freddie’s room.

I’ve had my hair cut today.  The last time I went was 6 months ago and I was pregnant.  I hoped upon hope that the girl would not ask me about it, and thank God, she didn’t.  I was so … Continue reading

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Work, worry and wishing.

May I take this opportunity to thank everyone for their continued support – each comment touches me deeply and it’s both comforting and sad to hear of people in the same situation. It will be 9 weeks tomorrow that Freddie … Continue reading

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To slip away.

I’m feeling pretty rough today, and my eyelids are pink and look as though they are trying to slide down off my face.  That’s what they look like when I’ve been crying a lot. When I was in hospital with … Continue reading

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Trolling for vampires.

I’ve been to the gym today, thank goodness. I didn’t go again yesterday because I still felt all ‘snarly and tangled’.  Yesterday I mostly wallowed by feeding my obsession with ‘Sookie Stackhouse’ novels to the point where I began to … Continue reading

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Knots and saying nothing.

I’m feeling a little more ‘knotty’ today than usual.  By that I mean that that anxious sort of heavy feeling in the pit of your stomach that I get a lot won’t seem to go away at all.  As soon … Continue reading

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Baby and toddler club.

I’ve just got back from a week in Turkey with Sam. I booked it two days after I got out of hospital hoping that we would look forward to it and that it would do us good.  And it did; … Continue reading

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Post-natal discussion.

Today I had my post-natal discussion at the hospital.  I wasn’t particularly apprehensive until I got to the hospital and walked through the doors into Maternity.  Of course there were pregnant women and babies strolling around, and it was difficult … Continue reading

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