Monthly Archives: June 2011

The real world…

For various reasons, I’ve decided that I’m going to go back to work before summer.  I had hoped to start back the week before school breaks up, and spend the week mostly catching up on everything.  It doesn’t look like … Continue reading

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Rage.

I’m trying very hard this time not to be so angry.  But sometimes I can’t help it.  I become consumed by the gut-wrenching, blood-boiling fury that this has happened to us.  That this is now the path of our lives.  … Continue reading

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Due date looming.

Due date. As recently as 20 years ago, some doctors wouldn’t permit a mother to see her stillborn baby for fear that it would make her go crazy.  Many people (particularly the older generation, I’ve found) still don’t understand all … Continue reading

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(un)Happy Father’s Day.

Not much to say really.

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Names.

12 weeks ago, Freddie was born. Sometimes it catches me strangley when someone else says my baby’s name; ‘Freddie’.  I’m not sure why.  There’s a millisecond where it’s as if I am caught in an impalpable web of that name; … Continue reading

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Energy.

I’m tired today.  I’ve slept badly the last few nights, probably because I’m hormonal.  And now my eyes are sore – my contact lenses end up feeling like they’re full of sand by the end of the day – I … Continue reading

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Administration problems and orderliness.

I just had a memory of when the midwife phoned me a few days after I’d got out of hospital.  I’d already spoken to one lady for her to arrange a time to come over, but we were busy with … Continue reading

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Partners

This morning when I woke up I thought it was still the weekend (probably because we’d been away for a night at a friend’s, which was great – we had a lot of fun playing on the Wii, I also … Continue reading

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Landscapes.

I feel a bit like a painting.  As in, when you put a wash on to begin a watercolour, if it’s terrible, then it doesn’t matter what else you paint on top of it; that terrible base will always be … Continue reading

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Mind and body.

So, I still weigh exactly the same, to the ounce.  I think that if I stopped going to the gym I would continue to weigh exactly the same.  Which is exasperating in a way I can’t describe; when you’re doing … Continue reading

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